Apocalyptic
/Apocalyptic. The word probably conjures up one of the dozens of end-of-days thrillers from the past 20 years. Or, if you grew up in evangelical youth groups in the 90’s, it might conjure the fear and tribulation of cheesy books or poorly acted movies that were meant to scare you out of hell. Both miss the point though.
Apocalyptic writing is actually about revealing, not destroying.
As a culture, we’ve mostly read the books like Revelation and spent our time trying to decipher how certain numbers add up to certain events, symbols represent conflict across the globe, or foresee the end of time. A grand adventure in missing the point. Apocalyptic writing has become more akin to ‘The DaVinci Code’ than to the revelation of timeless truths about humanity, God, and community.
I think we’re in an apocalyptic time, but not in the way where everything’s falling apart and doom is imminent. I’m not waiting around for the Rock (or Bruce Willis if you’re over 40) to fly in on a worldwide rescue mission. Things are being revealed, whether we like them or not.
Covid-19 seems to have served as a catalyst to reveal our hearts and minds, including our self-centeredness, cynicism, denial, and rampant anxiety.
Self-Centeredness:
How do you respond to news about Covid? Is your first thought about your own well-being, or that of others? Do you find yourself more concerned with finances, or the toll on healthcare workers? In 12-step rooms, we talk about our self-centeredness as “the root of our troubles,” we are “driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity.” (Big Book, p. 62). Some of the advice from these rooms has been helpful in curbing (not curing) my self-centeredness. Primarily that I look to serve others rather than satisfy my own wants.
Cynicism:
This is a biggie in American culture. We love rugged independence, sometimes to a fault, and find ourselves distrustful of anyone outside of our little group. It’s not uncommon for us to assume the ill-motives of anyone not thinking the same as us. This is the fertile soil of conspiracy theories, where we’re willing to believe anything so long as we’re right and everyone else is wrong. A helpful way to restrain this cynical tendency is to seek to give others the benefit of the doubt, rather than dismiss their motives straightaway.
Denial:
In the short run, it’s a heck of a lot easier to ignore the check engine light and assume it’s just a faulty sensor. You might notice it, but then dismiss it as being a minor issue. Or, maybe you just put some electric tape over it and pretend it away. I had a car worked on years ago and when I got it back, several lights were on. I took it back and was told that they must’ve messed up a sensor. I could get it fixed, but it’d cost money I didn’t have. So I drove on. As it turns out, they’d installed some stuff backward, and now the couple of hundred bucks to fix it turned into thousands. There’s no choosing no pain, you’re either paying for it now or later on with interest. A good question to ask is ‘What do I not want to be true about ___?’, or ‘What’s at stake if I believe ____?’
Anxiety:
I think this has become the fuel that drives much of the American way of life. Fear gets things done. Any successful political fundraiser can affirm that. The problem is that anxiety is just a couple of ticks from anger, and as we see on the daily, anger is filling our streets, school board meetings, churches, families, and pretty well every sector of life. Anxiety is a lot like dynamite; unstable, but when used in the right way, capable of getting a lot done. In the wrong hands though…well, just turn on the news.
So, what’s there to do? If Covid is revealing just how self-centered and anxious we are, how can we combat the destructiveness?
The remedy, though simple, is anything but easy. Get a friend or two to go in with you and intentionally challenge whichever of the above you struggle with. Here are a few tips to get you started.
Self-centeredness to Service
Find someone out of the ordinary to serve, maybe even someone you diametrically disagree with. Pay attention to the inherent dignity of those you serve.
Cynicism to Trust
Hang out with, read, or listen to folks who don’t think the way you do (preferably not the tv personality or politician opposite of your favorite). Look for your similarities rather than your differences.
Denial to Acceptance
Acceptance doesn’t mean agreement, but it allows you to hold things in tension. Make a list of things you don’t like but that you can’t control, then practice accepting that they are the way they are, or as we say in the Sip, they is what they is.
Anxiety to Action
Anxiety won’t simply go away on its own. You have to intentionally take action to rid yourself of it; prayer, counseling, journaling, yoga, exercise, maybe even meds. Typically, anxiety is about feeling powerless. 12-step groups have a time-tested way of helping with this, and an open meeting might be just what you need.